Saturday, August 25, 2007

Pedal Power


In the ever present “Battle of the Bulge” I am pleased to report another milestone - 30 pounds lost. I have a phrase cut out and posted on my bulletin board at work..it says “it won’t happen overnight, but it will happen”. That seems to be my mantra as of late…I am taking the plateau’s and riding them out…trying to eat healthier, keep up the exercise, and not be so “scale fixated”.

The need for keeping things interesting exercise wise has made me fall back on an old standard…I now have a new addition to my arsenal. Introducing my new Mongoose Mountain bike. Your immediate question….”should a man in his 40’s be riding a mountain bike” The jury is still out on that one.

The old adage at last for me does still hold up: “it’s like riding a bike” you never forget. Its true. For me the last time I rode a bike with any kind of consistency was during college. Once the bike was checked out, tires filled, water bottle ready – I did something else I never did back in my good old college riding days – I put on my new bike helmet. May I say this now, most people look dorky wearing a bike helmet – my new silver one makes me so much past dorky.

Here is the part I forgot. I think more than forgot, I simply pushed it from my mind choosing not to recall at all and move on. But like the flood of memories returning to an amnesiac the moment I pushed the pedal down and rode my first 3 feet it all came back to me……the seat, that numbing, genital crushing piece of torture…that’s why I didn’t ride my bike after college and drove everywhere…I wanted to not walk funny and have sensation in my groin.

So as you can imagine since college..certain parts of my anatomy have…well grown and expanded in an outward direction..hence the reasons for my fitness plan…so imagine fitting all of that volume on a seat shaped like a banana. My first ride was a success…felt good to ride…legs were strong, hands got tired, but overall really enjoyed it….but the next morning and for a couple of days following….I felt like the eraser that had been jammed down on top of a pencil…ouch.

I now have a cushioned gel seat to assist me. It helps some, but some reminders of days gone by will always be around. But on I go…if you see me out there say hello..I will be the dorky guy in the silver bike helmet with the grimace on his face.

Thursday, August 9, 2007

Squats and Lunges Are The Tools Of The Devil

With the renewed interest in all things health and diet related, I have undertaken a fitness plan as well as my dieting. It consists of two basic parts: the cardio portion, and the regular exercise portion. The cardio basically consists of a recumbent bike, the treadmill, and good ole walking. Like most of the world at large cardio is not my favorite, but it’s necessary...so I do it.

The exercise portion of my fitness plan was going to be based on using the weight machines and weight lifting at the gym, but due to an injury to my rotator cuff I wasn’t able to start. In the interim I decided I would purchase an exercise DVD and do an exercise routine at home to fill in for this part of my fitness needs. I spent a long time at the shelves of DVD’s pouring over the titles....what could I take on...what would represent a "good" workout. Almost every single selection they had to offer featured a lovely woman on the cover in some form of tight fitting work out attire. I didn’t want to do some sort of feminine work out...I wanted good ole fashion calisthenic exercise.

Finally after titles ranging from "Sweating to the Oldies", and "Erotic Belly Dancing for Beginners" to "Salsa Dancing for Fitness and Pleasure" I found a DVD with a guy on the front. It was called "Tom Holland’s Total Body Workout". Success - regular exercises, guy on the cover, this would do just fine. I paused for one minute in front of the Core Balls and related DVD’s...but moved quickly on....that saga is for another blog another time.

Got home, put on my not glamourous, loose fitting workout attire (shorts and a tank top) cleared an area in front of the TV and loaded up the "Total Body Workout". This is the part where if I had read more closely I would have realized that perhaps I wasn’t quite ready for the Tom Holland "experience". It is a 60 minute workout - fine...no problems...divided into different body groups...ok I can handle that....set to music....good I like that....without edits.....hmmm...um ok....well lets warm up a bit and off we go....

The warm up was fine...ok I can do this...and now let’s start with 30 seconds of cardio...running in place or jumping jacks...ok...can do that......now some squats.....ok now dumb bell curls....now down for some crunches...up for more squats...now more dumb bell curls....now more crunches...oh and then pushups....OH....WITHOUT EDITS....now 30 more seconds of cardio...now some lunges....and on and on and on...

Tom Holland whopped my ass. At the 14 minute mark I literally could not get up out of my crunch position...was drenched in sweat...had a cramp in my calf and Tom or (Attila) as I call him now hadn’t even broke a sweat. I Turned off the DVD, limped off to the shower and rethought the whole exercise at home decision. When the alarm went off early the next morning I knew that it was going to be a very long day. My neck would barely turn. The slightest flexing of any muscle below the waist reminded me that there was a reason I hadn’t done any of these exercises since highschool football.

The next day it was time to do it all again. My recovery time is not what it once was and I actually dreaded starting the DVD and doing it again...but I was determined....I got to 16 minutes on my second try. I am now up to 18 minutes. It’s embarrassing really...now I talk to the screen and call Tom Holland all sorts of names....at one point he says remember as your trainer you aren’t supposed to like me...THAT is a total understatement.