South Beach - Phase One - Day Two

Commericals are evil. Between the radio and tv commericals that bombard you throughout the day it makes anyone trying to be a good South Beacher a bit rough around the edges. Aside from the rare South Beach commercial it was a sea of fast food, pizza, and carbs. It doesn’t actually shake my resolve any, but what it does do is make whatever I am eating appear much less appealing.

Lunch was interesting. I tried a South Beach entree that is Phase one approved - basically just chicken and green beans. It was ok...basically like a lean cuisine - but without any pasta or potatoes. I had no trouble sticking to my plan, there was a time in the afternoon when I really got hungry but I lasted through til my snack and was ok the rest of the night. I made certain to have my fudgesicle for dessert and that was a surprisingly good change of taste for being no-sugar.

The rest of the bunch also seemed to do well enough...though the work bunch wanted to eat anything in sight by mid-afternoon. So far so good.

My Journey to South Beach

Weight has always been the major disruptor in the otherwise fairly normal progression of my life. I believe for a combination of reasons, that it was destined to become one of the most difficult addictions to affect me as an adult.

Growing up I was tempted by all of the usual vices, smoking, alcohol, recreational drugs, and frankly I did experiment as many young people do. The results of my experiments were as follows:

Smoking: as much as I wanted to be cool, cigarettes and or marijuana both made me choke and cough and that coupled with watching my father smoke like a chimney, made for a quick flirtation with smoking.

Alcohol: this one I seemed to fare better with - no choking at least. But I honestly discovered shortly after trying alcohol, that I could have just as much fun having one drink as I could having 5 or 6. To this day I am nothing more than a social drinker.

Recreational Drugs: These just plain scared me....being in athletics I didn’t want to do anything that might hurt my performance, and steroids were not yet a part of the scene except for bodybuilders...so the appeal was just not there for me. Besides, I never have liked the feeling of not being in control of my actions - so chalk up another one for "not my deal".

Ah....but food. Food was a different story. You had to eat. It’s a part of life. In my family both my parents were avid cooks and created in me a love of food, and cooking, and eating that goes back as far as I can remember. I have always associated food with good times, smiles and laughter, the many parties my parents threw, the huge family get together’s centered around a holiday meal. It was my childhood and adolescence and as an adult still is a part of my life that I treasure.

I don’t eat to live. I watch the Food Network. I am a good cook. I bear the mark of these three items in my waist size and shirt size and each and every time I look in the mirror. Like the many others in my position, I have yo-yo dieted up and down the scale too many times to count. I do posess the ability to lose weight - the will power, and the drive to keep it off though have all been for reasons that seem to never last. To be more specific, the reasons haven’t been for me they all seem to have been for someone else.

So..I embark on the journey once again. South Beach worked well for me before, so I bought the new book, read it, and am ready to give it a try. But this journey IS for me. It is for my health, it is for those I love and care about, it is for all the right reasons and for this reason I think I will have better success. I am joined by a rag tag group of friends, loved ones, and co-workers, each on their own journey, but nice enough to give me some support in my own.

I will use this blog to chronicle my journey good or bad in hopes that it may bring a shred of hope or laughter or understanding in your own.

Feeling Lighter

I have recently lost some weight….OK I have recently lost almost 20lbs….finally it is to the place where people are starting to notice and comment…which is definitely a nice affirmation. Believe me I do appreciate it. I think honestly for the first time I was motivated to make this change, not by vanity or some need to fit into the norms of people around me, but by the fragility of my own life. Recently seeing one of my co-workers go from a trip to the emergency room for chest pain to a quadruple bypass in a day....really got me thinking about my own situation and how I was heading down that same path.

I can't believe how many years I have found a friend and an unconditional source of comfort in food. It was always there for me...welcoming me and giving me pleasure...never failing to give me the feeling of relief and refuge from the world around me. Whether stress or depression, it always came through....and although most of the time I regretted it afterwards, for the moment I was at peace and sheltered from the harsh world surrounding me. I was young and it never really mattered if I gained a few pounds here or there...if it kept me sane, it was more than worth it.

I am not young anymore. My once resilient body does not have the memory it once did. Now it begins to show the results of a life lived for the comfort of food. My health has suffered, and my body has suffered, and I as a person have suffered. It was easier to cook then to deal with my life, easier to eat than to exercise and treat myself with the respect that I afforded to making the perfect dinner.

My parents have given me a wonderful heritage and at the same time a boatload of pre-existing medical maladies passed down through generations and now finally into me. I face a future of diagnostic tests relating to histories of diabetes, heart disease and alzheimers. I see my need for comfort and refuge not changing, but I do see that food has begun to lose the hold it had on that part of me. I love to cook, love to eat, but now that I am in the middle portion of my life, I can see that I love the idea of living even more.